DBT FAST Skills Worksheet
Prepare words you can stand behind, even when saying no or disagreeing feels uncomfortable.
About this tool
FAST is Linehan’s DBT mnemonic for self-respect effectiveness: Fair, Apologies (no excessive apologies), Stick to values, and Truthful. It asks whether your conduct fits your principles. Fairness includes both people, and truthfulness rules out invented excuses or exaggerated claims.
The A is often named “no apologies” in DBT, but this does not rule out an apology when you have done something wrong. Separate repair for a specific action from repeated apologies for having a reasonable need. FAST focuses on self-respect; GIVE focuses on the relationship, while DEAR MAN helps organize the request or refusal. These priorities can work together.
Completed example: A colleague asks Lee to cover another weekend shift. Lee’s fairness check includes the colleague’s need for coverage and Lee’s existing plans. Lee has not made a commitment to this shift, so no apology is needed for declining. The value is keeping personal commitments, and the truthful reason is limited availability. Lee rehearses: “I cannot cover Saturday. I can show you where to post the shift request before I leave today.” If Lee had previously agreed and then forgotten, acknowledging that mistake would be a separate repair.
Write an actual value, such as honesty or reliability, rather than a rule that the other person must agree with you. You can negotiate timing or wording without abandoning the value. The review asks what you did and what you learned; it does not assign a score to your character.
References
- Linehan MM. DBT Skills Training Manual. 2nd ed. Guilford Press; 2015.
DBT FAST Skills Worksheet FAQ
Does FAST mean never apologizing?
No. If you made an error or broke an agreement, name it and consider a repair. The practice is to avoid adding unnecessary apologies merely because a reasonable answer may disappoint someone.
What if sticking to a value sounds rigid?
Identify the principle and separate it from the method. Reliability might mean offering an achievable deadline instead of agreeing to an impossible one; it does not require refusing every alternative.
Do I have to explain every private detail to be truthful?
No. You can give a brief accurate answer, such as “I am unavailable,” without sharing your full schedule. Avoid substituting a made-up reason.
What if I feel guilty after using FAST?
Discomfort is not a character score. Review whether you were fair, accurate, and consistent with the value you named, then decide whether anything needs repair or further practice.