People who don’t know me all that well think I’m pretty calm about most things. People who do know me well know that my anxiety can spike rather quickly, even though I may appear to be (somewhat) serene. It takes a lot for me to lose my inner and outer composure, but that’s exactly where I was several days ago.
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My experience and attitude towards frustration has been a life long concern for me. For a long time, into my thirties, I of course, knew what frustration was and how it felt. However, when caught up in it I felt it impossible to do any thing about it except to react as if I was drowning in an emotional flood unable to hold onto anything substantial. During these “frustration attacks” I would lose whatever center I had, often lashing out in anger, or withdrawing either literally or physically from the scene of the moment or cutting myself off emotionally by numbing my feelings.

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